Acceptance

When I was in high school, I was part of this International Baccalaureate program where we had to take a 'Theory of knowledge' class every week. We discussed various topics in the class, but the core of it was based on questioning knowledge itself.

For example, if you're reading an article that you'd like to use for a fact-based research paper, how do you judge its value? What was the author's intention? He could be either truly objective or opinioninated (ergo you wouldn't use it if the goal is garner facts) This class taught us to really dissect any piece of information you learn / research so we wouldn't simply swallow whatever we hear, but actually THINK about what we're putting in our heads.

That's all fine and dandy, except now I see myself not able to accept things readily that I probably should. Sure, it's good to think about exactly what you want to save your brain space for, but somethings shouldn't be analyzed to the point of rejection.

I need to learn to take things more at face value. Maybe it's over time and I've become jaded (sounds so melodramatic since I haven't been through any REAL hardship compared to so many) but I don't want to live life following the scientific method (Purpose - Hypothesis - Methodology - Results - Discussion) <-- WOW I can't believe I remembered it!

I want to be aware, just not on high alert. The sky is blue, grass is green, and people can be nice without a catch.

What's the difference between a Pitbull and a Hockey mom?

Yes. LIPSTICK. I think I have learned something about myself thanks to red lipstick. I don't think any girl can just wear red lipstick. You have to be comfortable enough and secure with yourself to be like 'Look at me. I'm wearing red!' If you decide to wear the bright color out in public, whether you're trying or not, people DO look at you.

I prefer to be under the radar an not in the limelight. I figured red lipsticks were meant for girls that had that innate confidence and glamor. NOT me. But one fine day, thanks to the nudging of my sister I decided to buy red lipstick. a SERIOUSLY red one. It's a very pretty color and till yesterday it was lying in my makeup bag perfectly intact. I definitely wore it a few times an walked around...

in my own bedroom.

I was too scared to wear out in public because of all the voices inside me telling me I wasn't glamorous enough, or it would draw too much attention, or it wasn't my style and a whole other barrage of excuses.

BUT for the first time yesterday, against all my doubts, I did the very scary thing of WALKING in public with red lipstick on. I tried VERY hard to not be conscious of any stares and just kept my eyes straight ahead. It was a test. I CAN wear a bright color and not care!

I came back home intact. So did the color on my lips.

Point? I'm learning to be more comfortable with myself and take risks that I normally wouldn't. The bigger lesson? Only I can do that for myself. No one else can.

I'd say that's true for everyone.